We need the following. First, we need a catchy slogan for Obama. Make it something which captures the spirit of his campaign and what he hopes to achieve in his second term.
Secondly, we need you to come up with a game plan. Tell us what five promises Obama can make to America to win back the public and secure a second term!
You can be serious or not in your answers, and you can answer as many times as you like. But only one winner will be chosen to win the grand prize -- the satisfaction of having helped our Kenyan Overlord win a second term.
Here is a little something to inspire you!
May God have mercy yada yada yada. Get crackin'.
159 comments:
Andrew, what's our motivation here?
To help Commentarama with a contract we got from the Obama admini. . .
uh. . .
"know thy enemy!"
Obama/Biden: We don't really hate moms!
In all seriousness, they could never win me back. But I suspect that if Obama promised a flat tax, and a total revision of Obamacare to get the government out, that would be a great start.
DUQ, After today, I'm not sure that slogan will work! What a bunch of fools. Did you know that Hillary Rosen was actually hired to "soften" Debbie Wasserman Schultz's image! LOL!
Hmm. Those would be a good start, if they could be believed.
"I resign" would have made me a huge fan!
I would go with: "Obama/Biden, because sequels are always better." ;D
Obama/Biden 2012: Finally, a reason to be proud of your country.
You've asked an odd question here Andrew. What could Obama do to win me back? Nothing.
What do I fear Obama could do to win back moderates? Hmm. Maybe embrace Paul Ryan's budget?
Ed, Yes, that is actually my question, though I've made it a little more cloudy. What do you FEAR Obama could do to win back the middle before the election?
P.S. "I resign" works for me! :)
T-Rav, Nice! Bravo! LOL!
So thinking about it, T-Rav, is there anything you think Obama can do to win back the public?
Barry the Benevolent
“he loves you most”
More Sunny Days!
Bedtime Stories via SKYPE!
Free Marijuana Dispensaries!
Total Enlightenment!
Free Sex Changes!
Barry loves me this I know, Katie Couric tells me so
Democrats everywhere, kneel before him, he’s so fair
Yes Barry loves me, yes Barry loves me, Yes Barry loves me
Katie Couric tells me so…mmm-mmm-mmm…
"Let's Get Moving!"
I'll grab the boxes...
Obama/Biden2012 - Yes, We Can Be Flexible!
Stan, Brilliant! LOL! You should offer that to Obama as an anthem or campaign theme song! :)
You know what's funny about what you've written, is that it's very close to how science-fiction writers always deal with Big Brother. Rather than being stern, these monsters always say, "I love you," like they are trying to trick an abused spouse. I'll bet that if Obama went with something similar, it would resonate with Democratic audiences. "I have struggled against impossible odds because I love each of you."
Patti, LOL! Another good one with excellent double meaning! His own supporters would be holding up signs saying "Let's Get Moving!" and we would be laughing our collective butts off! :)
Obama/Biden 2008 - It's Bush's Fault
Oh wait that was their slogan for the last for years. Here let me update
Obama/Biden 2012 - It's Still Bush's Fault
Bev, A little (lot) flexibility would have helped then two years ago. I wonder if people would believe it now?
Bev, If Team Obama was an eating establishment, their motto would be: "Blaming Bush Since 2008".
Obama/Biden 2012 - Still the Smartest People in the Room
Bev, Small room!
Um, allow drilling and the Keystone Pipeline, I guess. And maybe announce across-the-board tax cuts. But those are things they'll probably never do, so I don't think that's anything we have to worry about.
I think Stan's list is closer to what they actually believe they need to do.
Instead of "Yes we can," how about "No we didn't!"
"Obama/Biden 2012 - Still the Smartest People in the Room"
Bev, that wouldn't be accurate if they were the only two people in the room.
Obama/Biden 2012 - We Can This Time, We Promise
T-Rav, If I'm reading my Obamas correctly, he will be promising a tax cut for "working people," punitive taxes on the rich, funding for child care and free contraception, and fighting to fix ObamaCare -- which the evil Republicans undermined.
I don't think any of those are winners, even with moderates. I think what he needs to do is (1) do something about gas prices, (2) promise cuts to federal agencies, (3) speed up leaving Afghanistan, (4) promise spending on programs the middle class likes, and (5) announce some massive reduction in meaningless regulations.
Oh did I mention that the only other thing in the the room is a box of rocks?
Bev, How about:
"Obama/Biden: We Never Said We Could In Only One Term."
Bev, What kind of rocks? Some rocks are much smarter than Biden. ;D
To borrow from Bev,
Obama/Biden: The Smartest Liberals In The Country
Ed, That's probably true. And let's make sure to add "most modest" to that as well!
"If something bad happens, Uncle Joe would be POTUS!" So don't forget; re-elect.
If you support me, I'll give you free money and promise to prosecute all Republicans whoever had ancestors who may have lived at the same time as someone who oppressed us.
Jed, That would be a pretty aggressive promise, but I can see it working with Democrats. Not so sure about the moderates though! LOL!
Yikes, the idea of Joe Biden as President should scare the heck out of people. I'm really surprised Obama hasn't replaced him with somebody like Cuomo?
Obama/Biden 2012: Arugula in Every Pot and Contraceptives in the Back of Every Car!
Obama/Biden 2012 - We'll Pay for Everything!
T-Rav, Oooh, I think we have our first foul. Do they really want to suggest people should own cars?
How about "Contraceptives in the back of every bullet train to nowhere!"
It Could Be Worse
Second Time's a Charm
Take Another Ride into the Future
THIS Will Be the Future We Meant Last Time
We're Still Proud
The Media is Controlled by the GOP and They're Lying because Things Are Getting Better, Really.
Bev, Now that is genius. That totally recaptures the spirit of modern liberalism! Well done!
rlaWTX, "It Could Be Worse"! I literally spit out my drink when I read that! LOL!
Andrew - If he replaced Biden now, he would be admitting that Biden is unfit and he made a bad choice. Of course I wouldn't put it passed them for Biden to suddenly have "health problems that keep him from running" or maybe an untimely fatal accident. With his motorcade's track record that is not out of the question.
Cuomo is waiting for 2016. He's building his street cred right now.
Obama/Biden 2012 - Just 4 More Years of This and Then We're Done!
rlaWTX - Bravo! "It Could Be Worse!"
Bev, yeah, I keep expecting a sick kid to pop up in Biden's house. I don't think "terminal foot in mouth disease" plays well...
thank you, Bev & Andrew!
Bev, Yeah, I actually can't see Cuomo joining Obama. I think the smart folks are staying away from him because he's being defined by history as a failure. In fact, I see Hillary won't even go to the convention. So I can't see Cuomo risking 2016 by latching onto Obama's flaming wagon now.
That said, I wouldn't at all put it past Obama to try to get Biden to have health problems so they could add someone with some actual appeal. I guess the only question is, who is left that would join him?
Is there some unknown, been-living-in-a-cave, 35yo multi-minority who needs a part-time job?
Slogan: "Better The One than Number Two."
1. I will build a polar bear refuge at the White House.
2. I promise I'll leave at the end of my second term.
3. I'll put a leash on the dog and Michelle.
4. Ignore the bill collector at your door, he was sent by the Republicans. I'll sic Eric Holder on him for you.
5. I will marry at least one male relative of Michelle's and issue an executive order banning all religious interference with the individual's love life.
rlaWTX, "I keep expecting a sick kid to show up!" LOL! Well said! You are really scoring major points today!
I think Biden will simply fake something like a heart attack scare or cancer. Nobody doubts those and they are enough to make people believe you would take time off.
rlaWTX, Keith Olberman would do it. ;)
Lawhawk, "I promise I'll leave at the end of my second term!" LOL!
Sadly, I discount promises like that. I note, for example, that Alec Baldwin never left for Canada.
Hmm. A "total debt forgiveness" plan might actually work -- mortgages, credit cards, student loans. Yikes. That would get him millions of votes.
Oh, could you imagine Olberman's first press conference!!!!
I know people who would vote for that debt forgiving thing - shudder!!!!!!!!!!
rlaWTX, It would be pretty wild, that's for sure. I'll bet he would even say things which would get Debbie Wasserman Schultz to shake her head! He'd get better ratings than he got at Current TV for that one!
And then, of course, he'd throw his usual tantrums and the Secret Service would end up shooting him within a year. Not that that would be a bad thing.
rlaWTX, I honestly think millions of Americans would vote for it. It would be a disaster.
Do you want four years of Mormonism shoved down your throats? Do you think they will allow your women to work? Romney wont allow women in his cabinet. He will require you to have the Mormon Bible at all times.
You really don't want that do you? Vote for me, and I will keep the Mad Mormon from you.
Joel, I honestly will not be surprised if that becomes something Team Obama spreads around "beneath the radar" -- especially in the South: "Romney wants to take your Bible and make you all Mormons" and "God will punish you for following a Mormon."
Excuse me? I'm very proud of my slogan, thank you very much!
Fine. How about "Arugula in Every Pot and High-Speed Trains in Every Garage"?
Especially the second one... in stealth attacks
(sigh) Throw me under the bus if you want, debt forgivers, but I always come back to bite you.
Let's see... it's smug and scientifically makes no sense... sounds perfect! :D
So what do you think of the "debt forgiveness platform"? I'll bet your fellows would turn out en mass to make that happen, wouldn't they?
rlaWTX, I would expect they will try it. It will be done by e-mail, fliers, and hints by local officials without any direct ties to Obama.
That's how they've always done it when they wanted to say something to anger blacks or Hispanics without whites knowing about it.
"Arugula in Every Pot and High-Speed Trains in Every Garage", that'll have to the coastal/Yankee slogan. The fly-over one can be "God will punish you for following a Mormon"
Economics. So true. There is no escaping reality.
[arugula makes me think if "Chitty-Chitty-Bang-Bang (book, not movie). The car's horn went "aaaoooogaaa"]
Debt forgiveness? Well, if by "my fellows" you mean "the other inmates at this asylum euphemistically called graduate school," then yes, they would go for it, and accuse anyone in opposition of not caring about the poor. Because that's how they roll.
From Biden to the women of America: If you vote for me, I will have sex with you.
From Obama to homosexual American men: If you vote for me, I will have sex with you.
Let's face it, sex sells -- "Money for nothing and chicks for free" would bring more votes than you might expect...
T-Rav, Yes, that's what I meant -- the other inmates. I figured they would all rush out and vote for Obama and the democrats whether they believed he could deliver or not. Sad, isn't it?
rlaWTX, I remember that! :)
LL, So true, sex does sell. I'm not sure sex with these two sells however. What they should do is a voter drive with Hollywood stars. "Vote for me and you can have sex with ____." That would probably be surprisingly effective!
Obama 2012 - Free Lunch is Here
Obama 2012 - Transforming America One Victim At A Time
Patriot, That pretty much summarized the entire Democratic Platform. Well done!
Obama 2012 - This Time He Means Business
That would certainly get conservatives scared -- "this time, he's means it." Ahhhh!
Obama 2012 Platform:
1) Revert to the gold standard
2) Fire Hillary Clinton
3) Tell China we are defaulting on our debt to them
4) Flat tax of 10%
5) Global free trade into and out of USA
6) Abolish The following Dept's - Educ, Energy, Commerce, etc....
7) Institute voting restrictions - If you are on any Gov't handout/subsidy, no voting
8) Corporate tax rate of 0%
9) Free health care and college education for any veteran
10) Make "Patriot" my Chief of Staff
Andrew.....I sorta like "This time he means BUSINESS" Can be taken a couple different ways
Patriot, If that had been his platform from the get-go, I think we would be looking at a very different election! I particularly like No. 10! LOL!
Of course #9 would be exempt from the #6 requirement.......
Wayback machine activated..... Make that the #7 requirement. There.....it never happened..
Obama/Biden 2012 - Yes We Can Escape Reality! That $16Trillion Deficit is all in your head!
Sherman, Who was that masked man changing history? LOL!
Yeah, being a soldier is not at all like relying on the government for a paycheck, so they should still be allowed to vote.
Bev,
Obama/Olberman 2012: Reagan Did Deficit Spending, So We're Like Reagan!
Obama 2012 - "I Want My 100 Scalps!"
Oh, I didn't read that Obama was running with Olberman. That's totally different...hmmmm.
Obama/Olberman 2012 - Two O's for the Price of Three!
Obama/Olberman 2012 - Just Say "O"!
Bev, They should add Oprah to the ticket too, then they could be "O"(cubed)!
Two O's for the price of three! LOL! And the aggravation of a dozen.
Patriot, LOL! I can see Pelosi collecting scalps, but not Obama. In fact, I imagine Obama's house as entirely empty... except for the stuff Michelle stole from 4 star hotels.
Obama/Pelosi 2012 - "You have to elect us to see what we're going to do"
Patriot - LOL! Perfect!
Patriot - I like your Obama/Pelosi ticket and slogan the very best of all.
That is perfect! It captures the whole "you can't believe anything we say" sense along with the "we have no idea what we're doing" sense. Beautiful!
Barry the Boy King
~ “proclaims” ~
________
^
“Resist We Much”
A Chicken in Every Pot
Reparations/Retribution
Redistribution/Restitution
REVOLUTION!
The 5 R's! Nice. I prefer the other R's -- resign, repeal, replace, Republican!
Andrew - Thanks for the Name/URL tip!
You all crack me up!!! Sorry, I don't have anything to add just yet. At the moment, it's been more fun to read the comments.
I also wanted to pass along thanks to everyone's reply from the other day.
Jen, You're welcome! No need to comment if nothing comes to mind. :)
UCC, You are so out of touch with reality it's not even funny.
Why are you even here?
Commentararomney? Hardly. But our audience isn't into uninformed, clueless knee-jerk opinion.
I doubt you even know what conservatism means.
Obama/Biden 2012: Math is racist and hates women.
UCC, as someone who has been consistently and sharply anti-Romney since long before you started posting here, let me just say this once. Whatever my personal feelings about him, he is going to be the nominee, he will be a far better president than Obama even with all his flaws, and it's time everyone face reality and get behind him. This screed does no one any good.
Obama/Biden '012: Because We Are STILL The One's We Are Waiting For!
Volt For Obama! Hope N' Change 2: Electric Bugaloo!
Episode 2: The Empire Strikes Back
Because We Haven't Had A Chance To Be Clear
C'mon Baby Don't Be Like That
Audaciousness Now! Occupy The Future!
Stick It To The Man: Obama/Biden '012
Great post and comments, LOL!
Let me repeat, there is nothing you will find here that is to your liking. You should go find a Constitution Party website and go hang with them.
Andrew,
How did you manage to snag an Obama infiltrator?
I though Biden was already suffering from dementia.
I was gonna say the same thing about Obama but on second thought realized he's just a retard.
UCC, I'm not going to throw you out, but let me be clear.
We have a very collegial atmosphere here. We are more than happy to discuss differences of opinion, but we will not allow people to post broad-based conclusory attacks meant to make other people uncomfortable or stifle debate.
Nor will we allow comments which are veiled attacks on contributors. Respectful disagreement is fine, attacking is not.
Nor will we allow the posting of comments which are sexually suggestive or which suggest racist views.
Those comments will continue to be deleted.
Ben, Biden's been suffering from dementia since birth.
Nice suggestions. I can't believe I forgot to riff on the "let me be clear" line!
Andrew,
You lawyers! Andrew, the rules of evidence don't apply in this situation. UCC is an Obama infiltrator. You managed to snag one.
We will erase the deficit by printing more money and make every American the 1%
Joel: The Romney rants do seem to be cut n' paste material from leftwing blogs. At least their talking points.
However, there are some on the fringe right that more or less merge with the left on many of these talking points so I can't say for sure.
Both are so wrong they ain't even to the level of wrong.
Thanks T-Rav! I was kind of surprised you hadn't tackled the let's be clear meme.
No worries, I got your back. Well, sides anyway.
I always wanted to be a peripheral bodyguard.
Ben,
So he plagiarizes as well? He doesn't have an original thought?
Obama/Biden 2012: The Audacity to Hope You Haven't Been Paying Attention
Yet another, case in point, a broad-brush nasty attack on libertarians... which will be deleted.
Why are you still here?
T-Rav,
How about "Dopes Audacity!"
I half expect him to come back with,
"Because I have no where else to go!"
What TV series used that line?
0bama Term 2: Electric Boogaloo
tryanmax,
What happened to your computer?
Joel, That was me on behalf of tryanmax who e-mailed me from a Kindle somehow and asked me to post his comment. Apparently his kids "bricked" his laptop, which I interpret as "set fire to while doing genetic experiments."
And for the record, I do love a good Electric Boogaloo reference! :)
Ben, I love the idea of making everyone top 1%. That sounds exactly like the kind of thinking we've come to expect from our liberal friends.
T-Rav, "Hope you haven't been paying attention." LOL! Nice!
Andrew: And make the 1% the 99%, LOL!
Remember when democrats could at least do basic math?
I would guess that Obama is popular among those who don't get basic math. Either that or they think that somehow all the money from "the rich" will miraculously multiply and our revenue will surpass our debt.
I like to call it Obamath.
I guess you think throwing around insults makes us respect you? What are you, 13?
You have yet to say a single thing with a fact behind it on any post. Your logic is troll logic. You don't seem to have a clue what conservatism actually means. And you're clearly just hear to cause problems.
Leave.
UCC: If it makes you feel better, my comment is about many of the views you have stated about Romney not a conclusionary attack based on everything you have said.
Romney at his worst doesn't come close to being as bad as Obama.
While I have seen objections to Romney's record at many conservative sites, I haven't seen mainstream conservatives (ie most) say that Romney is as bad as Obama.
The "Thurston Howell" comment is something I have seen many on the left and fringe right use.
You'll find no class warfare supporters here.
We ain't an envious bunch and while I don't speak for everyone here, I can say I have never seen a conservative here that doesn't think it's good when folks are successful in their business.
Andrew,
That's sad. I could have played around with him like a cat to a mouse. Can I get the next one? Can I? Hunh? Can I? Can I? Can I? Please, please say yes!
I knew Thurston Howell, and he, sir, is no Thurston Howell.
Nope, not a closed club. Just closed to you.
Why? How about because even now, you just can't stop taking shots at people and acting like a child. Seriously, are you 13? You act like it.
You have done nothing but post obnoxious comments since you got here. What comments you ask? How about the leering comments about Asian women or various actresses? How about your post about your story idea where the old man turns himself into a little girl so he can fall in love with a man? How about the constant attacks on articles where you make up facts and then suggest that everyone else was stupid for not considering your fantasy fact? How about the non sequitors like your sudden mention of Dennis Quaid.
You are either a troll or you have mental problems, and you really offer nothing we want.
Technically, Andrew, I think "bricked" means they managed to somehow kill the battery or otherwise render the computer completely inoperable. But "set on fire while doing genetic experiments" sounds more fun, so let's go with that.
Whoa. Whatever drugs UCC is on, I want some of that.
T-Rav, I may have embellished a few details regarding said laptop. ;)
United Citizens Council,
You have blocked your profile. You have not given your Facebook Name. You claim you are a conservative yet attack the basics of conservatism.
Your opinions are from left-wing blogs and right wing blogs that have adapted left wing tactics.
In fact, you hide your true self and act like an Alinskyite.
Oh, and it isn't your attacks on Romney, I have read worse here. It is the attacks after he has become the Nominee which show exactly who you are.
There is no secret handshake. Just a bunch of conservatives who act like conservatives.
How did I get dragged into this? Don't I get any forgiveness for "The Day After Tomorrow"?
Dear Mr. Quaid, I have no idea, unless it was a weak shot at the Innerspace article from the other day?
Anyway, while you're here. . . Pandorum? W.T.F.?
Yeah, that Dennis Quaid thing is connected...somehow.
Andrew,
Don't be too hard on him. After all he did do The Rookie and that was good.
Joel, I'm thinking Ben is on to something. There must be some meaning to the Dennis Quaid rant. Perhaps Dennis Quaid is secretly running the Romney-Alinsky campaign?
Andrew,
Let me handle it for a couple of posts. I promise I won't get snarky.
Andrew: No kidding! That movie made Day After look good in comparison. At least he wasn't half bad in Legion (a flick I didn't like much the first time I saw it but upon subsequent viewings it has grown on me).
Theologically speaking, I gotta say their was some glaring problems
9then again, it's very rare for any film makers to get angels right) but the overall message was good IMO.
My wife likes it so that's why I saw it more than once.
Funny how a film can grow on you after awhile.
Twilight, otoh has never grown on me. Personally, I'd rather be waterboarded than have to watch it again.
My wife is a sadist and I'm certain that despite her cover story she once was a CIA field operative.
The kind that know how to make anyone talk, if you know what I mean. :^)
UCC,
You change your access from private to public on blogger dashboard.
Do it and maybe we will talk.
"I really loved the site. I loved reading the articles and comments, I found them enjoyable and usually better written than the ones at Free Republic."
Usually?
"It is your property and you have that right, even if it makes no sense. Goodness knows it happens at Free Republic often enough."
Ahh, the smoking gun.
UCC,
Tomorrow, I will try your account again. I did access your Facebook account. I have a wife and I need to sleep.
Don't comment again until tomorrow. No one is trusting you right now and I don't blame them.
If you like what is written tomorrow, Say so. But don't add your opinion.
I am getting strict with you because no one knows why you have acted like a liberal troll. I will try to explain it to you. Good night.
Ben, watching Twilight makes me feel like I've been waterboarded.
I cut Dennis Quaid some slack. After all, he was in The Parent Trap.
Obama/Biden - It won't hurt as much the second time.
Obama/Biden - We're a big f---ing deal!
Obama/Biden - We ain't goin' to the back of the bus. We're drivin'!
Obama/Biden - So smart that we can be a talkin' like you common folk, no sweat!
UCC, Throughout this whole process, you have continued to make attacks on people. Even now, when you act contrite, you still suggest that we would be somehow "covering [our] tracks" by deleting your comments. What tracks? What exactly do we have to hide?
And don't pretend that you were startled by this tonight. The very first time you noticed a comment of yours had been deleted the other day, you posted an accusation. . . this: "My comment has been deleted, very interesting." You didn't even bother starting by asking what happened, even though everyone knows blogger sometimes eats comments or that your comment could have been caught in the spam filter. No, you launched straight into an accusation, which suggests a desire to be combative.
You may be a conservative for all I know, but I don't care. Your comments are designed to cause friction and that is not something we accept here.
Ben, Arg, The Day After Tomorrow... blech.
Good point about Legion though. I didn't care for it the first time through, but it's grown on me. I still can't call it a great film, but I've come to enjoy it.
T-Rav and Ben, Twilight. . . I don't recall that one? (I've been in therapy to forget I saw that one).
Koshcat, "It won't hurt as much the second time!" LOL! Nice, very nice.
Obama/Biden '012: Do It For Treyvon
Hoodies for all the non h8ters!
I missed all the fun!!!!!!!! I'm kinda bummed the ad nauseums were removed since I missed the train. :)
But classy responses, y'all, regardless of the provocation.
rlaWTX,
I missed it too. Boo!!! And I agree, the classy debate and discussion here are pretty much above reproach and it is nice to have a place to come for ACTUAL civil discourse. UCC should be exiled to Tucson. We have the National Center for Civil Discourse here. That is, if he is a conservative as he apparently claims. We all know that only conservatives get re-education for spewing hateful rhetoric.
Tam, Thanks! I like to think our whole operation here is above reproach. I know for a fact we get opposing views.
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