Thursday, December 15, 2011

T-Rav's Sockpuppet Theater Presents: Children of the Corn 2!

Because the last one worked so well, they're doing it again tonight! Live from Iowa, it's Children of the Corn 2: Pandering Boogaloo! Join us, tonight on Fox at 9:00 PM EST, casual dress, overalls preferred, B.Y.O.B. Farm subsidies for the first twenty people through the door!


Come one, come all....
... will Newt insult us all?
... will Romney say something memorable?
... will Ron Paul praise our new Iranian overlords?
... will Rick Perry shake the Teletubby?
... will anyone finally realize Santorum offers us utopia?
... will Bachmann don black-face to attract Cain's supporters?
... will Huntsman finally become a 2%er?

All this and more, tonight! Leave your thoughts below.

534 comments:

«Oldest   ‹Older   401 – 534 of 534
rlaWTX said...

the most coherent thing he's said!

T-Rav said...

Why is it always the Republicans who are politicizing issues?

AndrewPrice said...

Can't we just deem that everyone will give the same answer to this stupid question and move on?

AndrewPrice said...

Hey Ricks, wanna bet $10,000 that Iran doesn't invade the US anytime soon?

T-Rav said...

You know what? Forget Perry; doesn't Santorum's head and neck look kind of screwy?

tryanmax said...

The rivers keep them from wandering too far.

AndrewPrice said...

BINGO -- no job, no stayee

tryanmax said...

I think the problem is that the Ricks switched heads.

T-Rav said...

Andrew, at least they brought up Fast & Furious rather than asking something stupid like "What's your favorite color?"

rlaWTX said...

see - he's making sense again...

AndrewPrice said...

King says Gingrich is a dingbat.

Nancy Pelosi said...

My favorite color is, "the color." I think that really says it all, doesn't it?

AndrewPrice said...

Gingrich avoids the answer by throwing out lots of words and then ducking to the easy parts.

AndrewPrice said...

Everything Newt just said would be 100% irrelevant under his amnesty plan.

T-Rav said...

My high school history teacher was from Iowa, and she was a nice person. Took the volleyball team to state and everything. Then again, she also voted Green Party.

AndrewPrice said...

I hate the fact I agree with Huntsman... hate it a LOT.

rlaWTX said...

it's all OK because they have slowed down their illegal crossings??

AndrewPrice said...

T-Rav, I once spent a few days in Iowa for a wedding. They should vote for me.

Jon Huntsman said...

Rather than pandering to Hispanics, we need to be pandering to the Chinese.

AndrewPrice said...

rlaWTX, Yeah, when he got to that point, it all went wrong.

tryanmax said...

Hells no! There is no evidence that legal immigrants want amnesty for illegal immigrants. It sure wouldn't make sense if they did.

T-Rav said...

Andrew, but did you visit all 99 counties? Huh? Did you?

AndrewPrice said...

I changed my mind on abortion too. I advocate it for Democrats only.

AndrewPrice said...

T-Rav, They all look alike. ;)

T-Rav said...

tryanmax, actually, many legal immigrants have expressed the most intense opposition to amnesty for illegals. Funny how that never gets covered in the media.

AndrewPrice said...

Romney has a problem here, no doubt.

T-Rav said...

Keep going. I'm sure there's an answer somewhere in that string of words.

tryanmax said...

Is it too late for me to be aborted? I think I'm in the 129th trimester if my math is right.

Wallace said...

Are you now or have you ever been a gay loving, gun hating communist?

rlaWTX said...

oh! time for Santorum's foot to go into his mouth!

AndrewPrice said...

tryanmax, Not if you're a Democrat under my bill! :)

tryanmax said...

T-Rav, how can they report it? They've never taken a poll on it. Can't report the news if there's no poll.

Rick Santorum said...

I'm all over this like a fly on rye! Is that how that expression goes?

tryanmax said...

Maybe I'll switch parties just to get away from these debates!

Ricky said...

I hate gays.

AndrewPrice said...

Honestly, don't care. I'm all for gay marriage, but I oppose gay divorce.

T-Rav said...

Anyone know how this actually went down? (Darn you, lack of New England members!)

M. Bachmann said...

Newt personally performed abortions.

tryanmax said...

Yeah, well when Newt was working with Reagan...

rlaWTX said...

abortion is a seminal issue... did she mean to be funny?

T-Rav said...

Did Newt just swallow a gallon of vinegar or something?

T-Rav said...

rla, that's just gross right there.

tryanmax said...

I dunno, but I think it's funny.

AndrewPrice said...

T-Rav, No idea, but I can tell you that what Santorum has described would be unique in the annals of legal history if it were true.

In other words, odds are Santorum is wrong.

Newt Gingrich said...

As clear and consistent as my positions on every other issue.

rlaWTX said...

this debate could take 5-6 days...

AndrewPrice said...

Uh uh, could Newt be lying again?

T-Rav said...

Okay, I will say, I could not support a Republican who backed partial-birth abortion. That is a non-starter for me.

AndrewPrice said...

Get Joe Biden out of here!

T-Rav said...

What the...???

AndrewPrice said...

T-Rav, I honestly have no idea what Newt just said but if he said that then, I think you're right.

tryanmax said...

Santorum: I'm in Iowa! Go Iowa!


Iowa!

AndrewPrice said...

Not Tebow?

T-Rav said...

Guys! I just realized! This may be the first debate in which Bachmann did NOT reference being a tax attorney or her 23 foster kids! Is that a sign of the end times?

tryanmax said...

Perry: Footbawl!

tryanmax said...

Mitt: let me just not answer that question either.

tryanmax said...

Newt: rambling will confuse you into thinking I've answered.

Newt Gingrich said...

Oops! I had my fingers crossed!

AndrewPrice said...

T-Rav, That and the beeper... the end is nigh!

T-Rav said...

Go away. Idiot.

tryanmax said...

Paul: rEVOLution

AndrewPrice said...

There goes Michelle again stealing from prior Presidents.

tryanmax said...

Shelly: what was the question? Nevermind, I'll just say some stuff.

AndrewPrice said...

Who is this Reagan? We should vote for him.... not these jokers.

Newt said...

Yeah, well, I crawled up Reagan's pant leg - so I was closer!

AndrewPrice said...

Oh, thank God... it's over.

tryanmax said...

Huntsman, sadly, gave the best answer to the closing question.

rlaWTX said...

y'all are a blast!!!!!!!!

all the analysis they need is right here!!!

T-Rav said...

While Huntsman's blathering, after a quick read back through the comments, I think Bachmann was claiming Gingrich refused to purge any Republican who supported or did not oppose partial-birth abortion. That's not good, but it's not QUITE a line in the sand for me. I think.

T-Rav said...

So on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being a perfect performance by everyone and 1 being Saturday night's debate, I'd call this one a 3. Thoughts?

AndrewPrice said...

T-Rav, I don't know what she was saying, but it's worth looking into. If Newt did support partial birth abortion, that puts him in a very nasty fringe and should not be our nominee.

rlaWTX said...

Juan & Charles are their responses? seriously?

tryanmax said...

Shelly did what she's gotten good at, taken a point of minor disagreement and characterized it as the opposing POV.

AndrewPrice said...

Before anybody leaves, thanks for coming.

T-Rav said...

It's important to get the reactions of liberals such as Juan Williams in a Republican primary.

tryanmax said...

Fun as always.

AndrewPrice said...

T-Rav, My thoughts are this.

Overall: Dull, not informative.

Winner: Romney
Runner Up: Santorum

Big Loser: Newt and Paul... WTF

T-Rav said...

Ditto! Another great performance by the entire cast! :-)

rlaWTX said...

strong 10 for Commentarama

6 for Romney
4 for Huntsman & Bachmann
3 for the rest but Paul
1 for Paul

3 overall

AndrewPrice said...

And Newt has earned himself a new picture.

T-Rav said...

Ron Paul's problem is that he doesn't realize the people supporting a tough stance against Iran are not a neocon "fringe," they are actually the majority of the party.

tryanmax said...

Don't you know, only a liberal can effectively discuss conservatism. Just like only a liberal can effectively discuss liberalism.

Or how only a liberal can effectively discuss capitalism, small government, deregulation, and so on.

rlaWTX said...

good night all...

tryanmax said...

Ron Paul totally forgot to take his pills tonight.

Frank Luntz said...

Bow down before my awesome polling analysis!

tryanmax said...

Any name ending in "untz" is funny to me.

T-Rav said...

G'nite rla! Thanks for sticking around!

Andrew, I can't wait to see the new Newt picture.

AndrewPrice said...

I don't think we had any surprises tonight. But we had a lot of confirmation:

1. Newt confirmed to me that he doesn't care about the Constitution.

2. Romney is a safe, unexciting pick.

3. Huntsman is smart, but too liberal.

4. Santorum is getting good at sounding not-toxic.

5. Paul is so far off the deep end on foreign stuff he's becoming scary.

6. Any one of us would be better in the job.

AndrewPrice said...

Good night everyone! :)

tryanmax said...

Boonowa tweepi, ha, ha.

tryanmax said...

Not me, I'd totally let the power go to my head. Just bein' honest.

T-Rav said...

Andrew, if a few weeks from now you're in Santorum's camp, I'm going to laugh and laugh....

Tennessee Jed said...

just logged on; looks like you guys had fun. As expected, I continue to learn to like Mitt Romney. This is just a mixture of the reality of things and how he did tonight (which I thought was pretty strong.) Ron Paul can say some great things, but may have shot himself with the Iran thing. Newt continues to show his debate skills, but He just seems disingenuous to me.

AndrewPrice said...

T-Rav, I can assure you that won't happen. While I can appreciate that Ricky manages to sound "not-toxic" compared to the other idiots, I also know the man is a total fool with no idea what he's doing, no platform, and a thought process that scares me as much as Paul's only in a different direction. He is not a man who should ever be trusted with any amount of authority.

AndrewPrice said...

tryanmax, Ok, you can be VP. ;)

T-Rav said...

Jed, I notice you capitalized the "he" when referring to Newt. Is he your God? ;-)

Individualist said...

OK I actually watched this debate and I just have this advice for Ron Paul...

Engineer Scott of the StarShip Enterprise said

"The best diplomat I know is a fully loaded phazer bank"

AndrewPrice said...

Jed, This was a strong debate for Romney and Paul really pushed himself further out on the ledge.

This debate more than any other should scare conservatives about Newt. He basically proposed shredding the constitution several times to force his will on the courts and the Congress. His ego is insane.

T-Rav said...

Andrew, that's what you say NOW! (Okay, I'll stop before you chase me out of here with a broomstick.)

rlaWTX said...

ok, stopped back by and totally agree with Andrew's 6...

and looking forward to the Newt pic)

AndrewPrice said...

Indi, LOL! Nice reference.

I like a LOT of what Paul says, but I fear that he would get a lot of people killed with his foreign policy which seems more and more like absolute isolationism.

I don't subscribe to the stupid hawk view that's beset the Republican Party, but Paul's "surrender at all costs" is unacceptable as an alternative.

T-Rav said...

Wait a minute, how is it hard not to like Ron Paul, Newt? As anyone here will tell you, I don't find it hard at all.

tryanmax said...

I love Scotty.

Individualist said...

Romney wins for the eVerify comment

(if we pass that law then illegals can't get a job... well except in Miami of course.. but other than that)

Individualist said...

Andrew

If you ignore the foreign policy stuff Paul wins the debate..

Scary huh!

T-Rav said...

After this debate, my list of candidates, from most to least favorable, is as follows:

1. Michele Bachmann
2. Rick Santorum
3. Mitt Romney
4. Rick Perry
5. Newt Gingrich
6. Jon Huntsman
7. Ron Paul

Keep in mind, this is more based on who I have the fewest problems with, rather than who I actually like.

Oh, and 500 comments! New record!

Individualist said...

Bachman had moments where she did very well....

But...

She lost me totally when she had to tell Gingritch "I am a serious candidate running for office"

Of course Gingritch is going to tell you your facts are wrong Michelle, you are disagreeing with him and he is Gaius Newtus Gingritchinas, leader of the 1994 Cohort of the GOP Congress.

Toughen Up... Men are mean... be mean back... you should excel at that yhou are a woman and should be able to lead the men around by their noses.

Individualist said...

Santarum and Huntsman do not impress me for President but somehow I think they would be great at a cabinet post.

I could see a Secretary of State Huntsman

Is that wrong...

tryanmax said...

I could see Huntsman as Secretary of Appeasement.

AndrewPrice said...

Indi, Huntsman strikes me as a great advisor, but not a man I would want making the decision.

Bachmann is not a serious candidate, never has been.

If the Presidency was just economic, then I could support Paul, but it's not.

AndrewPrice said...

T-Rav, My list would be:

1. Anybody NOT on stage.
2. leave the office unoccupied
3. Romney
4. turn to crime

That's about as far as I can order them before it gets complex.

tryanmax said...

Leave out the complicated stuff, where does expatriation fall on your list?

AndrewPrice said...

P.S. 500 comments rocks! :)


tryanmax, Ambassador to China for Huntsman.

AndrewPrice said...

I'm more of a fighter than a leaver, so I would put expatriation just below "terrorist/revolutionary".

tryanmax said...

LOL! Whenever my friends start talking survivalism (a rare topic, but it comes up) I always say I won't need to know how to survive because, when the revolution comes, I plan on being against the wall.

AndrewPrice said...

Is that a Hitchhiker's Guide reference?


(fyi, I just saw about 6 of your comments in the spam filter. Not sure why. I told it you are not spam.)

tryanmax said...

If it is, it is unintentional. I just figure with my Kissenger glasses and my subversive rhetoric, some handsome gentlemen with armbands on their sleeves will show up at my door on behalf of The Party.

tryanmax said...

Ah! It does seem to be a Hitchhiker's Guide thing. I must read them again, soon.

AndrewPrice said...

Yeah, because as the book says about the future, "they were the first against the wall when the revolution came."

tryanmax said...

I must have read it and liked it so much, I took it for my own. In any case, that is my survivalist plan: not to.

Individualist said...

Ah yes

the Marketing Deaprtment of Sirus B or some such

I always envision the people who work at the New York times when reading that

AndrewPrice said...

Yep, that's them. And that's funny, because I think the same thing!

Individualist said...

Perry had a winning comment when he talked about the 10th ammendment

Individualist said...

I think Romney should just state..

"Look, I was Governor of freakin Taxachutsetts for Chrisssakes... course I had to be a friggin Rino or they would of Lynched me.... these are the same dolts that kept electing Bwarney the Frwank back to office...

But heyh don't worry I am a true Converserative now... Wink wink

AndrewPrice said...

Indi, That seems to be where he gets into trouble, when he tries to recharacterize his prior liberalism as somehow really conservatism. His best bet is "I've changed."

Individualist said...

Yea I think you are right

Although I will state that when he equivocates he is giving what appear to me to be honest answers.

The whole Gay Marraige thing is believable. As Governor he had to sign those documents probably for understandable procedural reasons although I am not going to state I understand what they are..

Still that does not help with the soundbite does it.

T-Rav said...

Don't worry. We may all be the first ones against the wall when the revolution comes, but at least we can share the space with the OWSers and the Young Communists. (I know, I know..."but I repeat myself.")

T-Rav said...

OT Breaking: Christopher Hitchens has passed away.

AndrewPrice said...

Indi, Yeah, the flip flopping seems to be the honest answer. Ug.

I have not looked into the gay marriage thing, but the way Santorum described it simply doesn't make sense to me. Governors are not given a choice to follow the law or pick some alternative. My guess is that Romney was right that the court ruled and it was a question of getting the legislature to overturn the court, which ain't gonna happen in Mass.

AndrewPrice said...

T-Rav, Let's be zen about this... let's be the wall! :)


I never followed Hitchens. I found him to angry to be worth listening to.

Unknown said...

Looks like you had fun. In fact, it looks like your comments are a helluva lot funnier than the debates. I'm ready to vote by flipping a coin. Enough! No more debates until it's time to take on the Evil One.

tryanmax said...

I just wish Romney could explain himself better. I assume he was just signing something because, as executive, that's what he had to do. But I shouldn't have to make that assumption.

Besides, I can totally see Mass. going in for gay marriage and, if that's what they want, and they go about it through proper legislation, give it to them. We don't want an executive that allows things and strikes them down based on his personal predilections.

Elections have turned too much into "What would Candidate X's do if he were king?" rather than "How would Candidate X uphold the law?"

rlaWTX said...

Tryanmax: "Elections have turned too much into "What would Candidate X's do if he were king?" rather than "How would Candidate X uphold the law?""

Excellent point!!

AndrewPrice said...

tryanmax and rlaWTX, That's exactly the problem. These debates stop being about "what would I do as president" and then become about bragging and making promises that can't be kept. They all do it. That's why we should always be suspicious about things that sound too good from these candidates:

... I'm going to fix marriage.
... I'm going to return us to the constitution.
... I'm going to oust liberal judges.
... I'm going to repeal ___.
... I'm going to scrap the tax code!

None of these things can be done by a President, yet this is all we hear because it sounds good. And in the process we end up picking the biggest braggart rather than the person best able to achieve the most conservative result.

We need to hear them tell us what steps they plan to take to make things better rather than tell us how they plan to fix everything in fell swoop.

«Oldest ‹Older   401 – 534 of 534   Newer› Newest»

Post a Comment