It's time for the first Sunshine State Debate of the week and that's somehow fitting, given the proximity of Disney World and the fact that we would be better off turning the country over to toons. Tell us which Disney characters remind you of each of the candidates and why.
Monday, January 23, 2012
T-Rav's Sockpuppet Theater Presents: Floriduh!
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«Oldest ‹Older 201 – 397 of 397Jed, Williams has indeed made this ugly.
Wait a minute! How did I let an actual policy question get in here?
NBC kicked me off the feed for a moment. I'm thinking their blood pressure monitor told them I was going to explode and blow up Florida.
Maybe the answer is to stop letting guys named Williams moderate our debates?
Trouble is, Paul makes the answer seem more complicated than it needs to.
tryanmax, That's true... plus the insanity.
Careful Andrew. If you blow up Florida all the way from Colorado, I'm in the line of fire down here. Try thinking positive thoughts about Newt; my life depends on it.
Is Paul still answering the same question?
You know, Paul must be a hell of a bedtime story telling grandpa!
It is a sad day when Brian Williams can knock out the two leaders without even sweating. He makes it too easy.
I have a sickening feeling that's going to be the most conservative response.
F-you Newt. If you repeal Dodd Frank right now... nothing changes.
This Dodd Frank stuff is insider crap. Dodd Frank was a placebo.
Stay on target!
Ok, let me clarify -- that part is true.
"I'm getting better."
At the risk of causing someone on this blog to have a total meltdown, here goes...according to a Twitter feed, Fred Thompson just endorsed Newt on Fox News.
Good answer -- sent Castro to hell!
He's talking about me, right?
T-Rav, I'm fine with it. The country will survive another Barack term I guess.
RE: Grandpa Paul -- Maybe, but I'm afraid he tries too hard to explain how the three little pigs were substandard buildings are the result of expanding section 8 legislation coupled with the fact that the pigs were upside down on mortgages that they shouldn't have received in the first place due to their lackadaisical ways. To Paul, the Big Bad Wolf simply represents the invisible hand of the marketplace.
Yes, let's go to war with Cuba.
tryanmax, LOL!
Well, if Fred Thompson says so, sell then...
Shut up you @#$%ing hobgoblin idiot.
Ron Paul.Ron.Paul.
If only we'd been talking to Berlin from the beginning!
Cris, Yeah, Fred's convinced me too. Just like his endorsement of McCain last time.
Mountains of aid? I thought we were zeroing out aid?
Oh God, not this again. Ricky is buying into a myth.
Why does no one ever listen to me? I'm always 5-6 years ahead of everyone!
Nothing's an act of war until a formal declaration's been passed by Congress! The Constitution!!!
Romney gives smart answers...
Newt gives smart-ass answers.
But, Andrew, Newt is passionate in his stupidity. Who wants a smart president? Pthzzz.
Hey, you know what would be a good way to counter the Iranian threat? Authorizing the Keystone pipeline so we're not so dependent on Tehran. Just saying.
Nope, never gonna win in Afghanistan.
That's true Andrew. Newt just said that Americans on't want to go to war --even after the twin towers.. Uh, nice try
tryanmax, Many people have observed quite correctly that the public always chooses flashy over smart. Welcome to planet earth.
Here it comes..Uncle Paul
No, T-Rav, we will regulate our way to energy independence. Oil doesn't fuel our economy. Legislation does.
Yup, it's all our fault because of sovereignty or something. This answer is the epitome of everything that is wrong with Ron Paul.
Cris, I the last couple minutes have just been a jumble of bizarro statements that don't make any sense in the real world.
No one is being honest.
Four years = winning a war quickly.
Maybe Romney should wear a sequined jumpsuit? I bet he could pull it off...
At least Paul was against Hitler and Pearl Harbor
Cris, Foreign policy really is where Paul goes off the deep end. I'm sometimes surprised he doesn't drop his pants when he gets into this topic and try to wrap his underwear over his head.
tryanmax, If I ever ran... that would be me! AWESOME!
No, T-Rav, we will regulate our way to energy independence. Oil doesn't fuel our economy. Legislation does.
And as a constitutional law professor, I would know!
NBC keeps cutting me off at the commercials and I have to restart. I wonder what they're hiding?
CrisD, apparently only because there was a formal declaration of war.
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!
Ow, my head. I think this is killing bairn llecs.
Andrew, nbc cuts me off at the commercials but comes back on..here it is
Nothing, Andrew. Just watch these subliminal images on the screen, and if it feels like someone's putting thoughts in your head, don't fight it. It's totally natural.
Adam Smith! The exhumed him?
"invisible hand baby!"
Reinhard looks like Tina Fey.
Bomb bomb bomb, bomb bomb Iran...
Top 10 List for Act of War....
1. Pirating films....
2. ....
Surprise! I can give good answers after all!
Here, Andrew, have some music notes:
♪♫♪♫♪♫
More Democrat Journolist Hacks. Why am I not surprised.
Andrew, if Adam Smith was still alive, I get the feeling he would change his name in disgust.
I think we should not allow offshore drilling. Instead, we should go back to whaling and manatee tossing.
Ask the people who actually live and work on the Gulf, sweetheart.
Well, considering tourism occurs annually and, hopefully, oil spills occur much less often.....
T-Rav, I think he would have stormed out long ago.
Worked for us!
tryanmax, Whaling never leads to oil spills. Trust me on this!
Shhh, T. Why are you bringing logic into this?
Personally, I favor making Polish the official language of certain states... against their will of course.
Apples and Oranges, baby.
And yes, I'm calling her "baby" because I bet she hates it.
Greek Independence Day?
Isn't that where Turkeys blow up the White House and Bill Pullman needs to save our butts?
It's Hack-O-Rama!
I notice that they are giving Santorum and Ron Paul chances to give out good answers.
They aren't even getting close to giving Romney or Newt a chance at Oil.
Whaling is making a comeback. What with lightbulb bans and all. We'll be burning oil lamps again, and whale oil is the best.
Someone get a net for this broad. Wait, is "net" offensive?
Can Polish be the official sausage, as well?
English immersion is the only way to go. And that is a solid defense of English as the official language... "the language of America."
I actually think Paul's answer is really good on that subject.
And they say libertarians never pander....
Grrrr. Dream Act. Hate it.
She has an unusually large distance between her nose and her mouth. Why does this draw my attention?
tryanmax, I think Paul is right... from a Tenth Amendment.
Vee have zome problems with de Polish....
Liberals are so easily confused aren't they?
Because you're a sexist, T, that's why!
Ricky sidesteps the issue... naturally.
Oh, so is that why I do a horrible tie contest every debate, too? Preview: this one's gonna be a squeaker.
Andrew, they're so confused they're asking immigration questions in a state where the main Latino population is Cuban, not Mexican.
So once again, Rick tells the us he believes in the exact opposite of what he's always believed.
As you can tell from my weight, that didn't work out so well.
tryanmax, I don't dislike Newt's tie tonight. Romney's tie is really weak. It looks like a table cloth form an Italian restaurant.
♪♫Sugar!♪♫Da-da-da-da-da-da♪♫
♪♫Oh, Honey, honey!♪♫
SAVE NASA!!!
I said I'd turn this economy "around," not "up." You dumb Republicans obviously misunderstood me.
Wow, Paul's tie sucks too.
So far we've learned that whaling is making a come back, sugar is king, and none of these idiots knows how to buy a good tie. Somehow that's not as productive as I'd hoped.
Fun fact: That Marjorie Mackinnon or whatever her name was who wrote the big book on protecting the Everglades? Hated the place, and only went there like once in her life. Not that I'm implying anything.
I think tryanmax will struggle with his tie award tonight.
You would think a place called EVERglades would be better equipped to last forEVER?
Who's gonna watch this musical "Smash" thing on NBC?! Spirit fingers!!!
Of course, I camped out in the Everglades once and--well, I get its importance to the ecosystem down there and everything, but I wasn't too fond of it.
T-Rav, We in the slow part of the country aren't getting ads because the debate isn't on television out here... we're waiting for the Pony Express to deliver it.
I once saw an Indian (Seminole) wrestle and alligator in the Everglades. I was impressed.
Oh crap, it's back on! I mean, oh great, it's back on!
Did somebody say "Everclear"?
Brian Williams has made these guys sound weak, stupid, slow and Newt isn't even angry about it. He has managed to make Santorum look better. Paul the wily fox out did Williams though. No matter how much Williams tried to help him, Ron Paul still manages to get the Tin Foil hat out.
Brokered Convention anyone?
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!! Terry Schaivo!?!?!?
DRINK!
The government should always have more say about your marriage than you.
Otherwise, you might make the wrong decision.
Why are we asking about this? But since we are, why should that spouse be able to make that decision, to the total exclusion of the parents and anyone else?
T, Everclear's the same as absinthe, right?
Look, the Constitution only matters when it does something I want. When it would stop me, then don't give me any Constitution crap.
T-Rav, The law decides who gets the right to make these decisions based on historical reasons related to whose interests are most at stake.
These reporters REALLY care about people's job, huh NOT!!!
Gingrich and Santorum, the voices of reason. Lordy lordy.
YESSSS!!!!!
So now Florida is claiming it created the space program?
Cris, Jobs = bad because Obama has failed to deliver. Let's talk about the things that scare moderates.
I agree, SAVE NASA!!
I would commit to putting an American on Mars. I can even name the American(s).
Andrew, given that the husband was already in a relationship with someone else when he demanded the plug be pulled, that was most definitely not the same thing.
I'd like to see a leaner Newt. Just sayin'.
Mars????????????????????????????????
Huge mirrors that heat/cool the planet!
We created the space program! "Houston, we have a problem," DUH!
Wait, why is it so important that we go to Mars right away? Do we need to have a battle station there? Maybe a really big shield generator?
T-Rav, He may have been a slime, but the law almost always gives these powers to the spouse for a whole lot of reasons -- assets, right to remarry, etc. You just can't let multiple people have these powers.
Hey, it's almost over!
T-Rav, Mars needs women...
We need to get to Mars because the Muslims have declared Caliphate on it. We need to prevent Sharia law taking hold of the red planet.
So far, I'm scoring it this way:
Newt, Romeny, Paul, Santorum: 0
Brian Williams: 85
Nope. The right to life trumps property rights, marriage rights, etc. If the law doesn't recognize that, it needs to be changed. I ain't bending on that.
I draw the line at a Martian government program. These people can F themselves
Actually, the score needs to be
Newt, Romney, Paul, Santorum, Our Brain Cells 0
Brian Williams 85
Seriously though, I think we've already committed to aid to Mars, so now we need to work on getting it there.
We must bring Islam to those green Martian infidels!
(with a sidelong look at Newt)
That's all great, Mitt, but why aren't you wearing sequins?
I made Reagan!
Wait, what? How did you help Reagan become President???
Gingrich worked to build a conservative movement until about 1994-5. After that, not so much.
Why is Williams pitching softballs to Santorum?
Oh, that's right... he wants a horse race.
I would like to thank all the candidates for playing right into my hands tonight.
T-Rav, "not so much" LOL! Bravo!
Don't you remember, Then NEWT said, “Let us make Reagan in our image, in our likeness, so that they may rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky, over the livestock and all the wild animals,[a] and over all the creatures that move along the ground.”
I peeked back in and am very glad I ran away...
Santorum *shakes head*
Santorum needs to STFU.
What's Santorum talking about now? I think my mind wandered off and didn't tell me.
Paul is actually making sense here.
don't leeeeeave meeeeee.....
Ron Paul: "We're a bunch of losers."
I wish I could vote for Paul... but it's just not possible.
And remember t, Newt needed only three hours to rest, not a full day. Because he's that awesome.
Dear Brain,
Sorry.
Andrew
I really almost can't handle this.
You guys joke, but you do know that Newt created God, right?
Andrew, anything is possible with meth.
Meth! It's a helluva drug!
CrisD, In all honesty, I'm feeling the same. This is very, very hard to watch and I would not be watching this if it weren't for all of you.
T-Rav, that was awesome!
Just so you people know, T-Rav has been struck dead with a lightning bolt and will not be joining you for the rest of the night. You have been warned.
This is a pandering ploy. He does this every time trying to steal other people's supporters by "agreeing" with them without actually agreeing with anything.
How is Newt separating himself from the "elites"? How?
tryanmax, Are you channeling Rick James?
Oh, LORD, if you see fit to spare your faithful servant, T-Rav, please, return him to us.
Dear God,
T-Rav had it coming. Can I have a pony?
Andrew
So this is what it's like to be moving in and out of consciousness.
It's over... it's over!!!
No. I know what you did with the last one.
T-Rav, Come back to us....
Andrew- ditto
Aaand I can't handle listening to Chuck Todd run his mouth. Goodbye, NBC.
Awe. How was I supposed to know you can't give a pony cocaine? It's a hell of a drug!
Okay, time for the Horrible Tie Contest:
DRUM ROLL
Real squeaker tonight. Someone apparently told Ron Paul to stop wearing old man ties and the candidates all played it pretty safe. But don't forget, the moderators are also in the running.
Winner - Newt Gingrich. I wouldn't upholster a couch in an old folks home in that pattern. I wouldn't use that pattern on the drapes in a funeral home in the bad part of town even if it hadn't been redecorated since 1976. I might make a pair of parachute pants with that pattern. But probably not.
Runner up - Ron Paul, admittedly because it just seems unfair to always give it to him. Plus, he takes some credit for actually not wearing something as awful as he usually does. Though I do give him props for sporting the big knot. It's coming back, baby!
Honorable mention - Brian Williams for his prep school selection.
trynmax, What about your tie verdict?
You're darn right, meth is a great drug!
Am going to watch something funny before I turn in. Bye all!
This was painful tonight. Arg. Tomorrow night is gonna be worse.
Hate to say it, but when it comes to meth, Nebraska and West by God Virginia have a lot in common. I suppose I could say the same about trailer homes, but that would be redundant.
I'm leaving too. I have to write a summary. Arg.
"Something happened, we talked about giving aid to Mars."
Andrew, I have it on good authority that you let that pony get high on its own supply. Maybe that's why God won't give you another one.
Don't forget the sequined jumpsuit. I think there should be fringe on the sleeves. Lots of fringe.
tryanmax, They aren't trailors anymore, they are now "prefabricated homes."
Pthzzz! You mean "prefabricated labs."
tryanmax, if Elvis didn't kill that fashion off, Conway Twitty did. Let it go, man.
tryanmax, Second picture down: LINK.
Now that would be debate jumpsuit!
On the pony, I have it on good authority that it knew Rick James... so I'm innocent (or at least not guilty).
I can give you a summary right now: I'm definitely in the tank for a brokered convention after this.
I am SO voting Presley/Twitty '72!
All right folks, I'm outta here for a while. Thanks for playing along!
Andrew, that must be what the angels wear!
I obviously need to go. Night, all!
tryanmax, That's my vision of Heaven. ;)
This next one goes out to Newt Gingrich. Ladies and Gentlemen, Mr. Conway Twitty
LOL! I'm sorry Newt will be happy about that!
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