Wow! What A Hunk!

Oh, wait, that wasn't the point of the photo or this article. But since we just finished pointing out that the Secretary of Education can't read the Constitution, why not point out a young man who not only can read it, but can post the Fourth Amendment on his torso after carefully writing it using a mirror? We know he used a mirror, because as carefully as he did it, he got the 4 in "Amendment 4" backwards.

We can also easily discern that he is not a Harvard University student, or he wouldn't know the Constitution exists in the first place. In fact, he is getting his education in flyover country, at the University of Cincinnati. That's located in a state I think is called Ohio, or Oh-why-oh, or something like that. It's obviously insignificant since it isn't New England or the Left Coast.

21 year-old Aaron Tobey had determined in advance that he didn't want to glow in the dark, so he opted for the full pat-down at the airport. He's lucky that wasn't San Francisco International Airport or he would have been delayed indefinitely. But that's another story entirely. He knew he would be required to strip down to his skivvies, so he figured he might as well make a point at the same time. Big mistake. A nice tattoo picturing a bloody heart or the face of Osama bin Laden would not have slowed him down for a second. Tobey unfortunately chose to list a subversive manifesto written by a bunch of racist old white men, so that meant he was dangerous.

Even though Tobey was completely cooperative, and didn't object to the pat-down, words have consequences. Here, the words of the Founding Fathers, written in part by his Virginia ancestors, were more than enough to cause the protectors of all things American to handcuff and detain young Tobey for 90 minutes. You see, a gang of Arabs in native attire and speaking loudly and excitedly to each other in Arabic while brandishing Korans is no cause for detention (except in the mind of liberal Juan Williams who has been diagnosed by NPR as insane). But the English language version of the 4th Amendment on a young patriot's chest--that's clearly dangerously subversive.

The behavior of the rest of the United States is beginning to sound a lot like what is said about San Francisco--"you can't make this stuff up." Even more suspicious than the writing on his torso was Tobey's reason for flying that day. He was on his way to his beloved grandmother's funeral in Wisconsin. Yeah, Aaron, every terrorist has tried to use that one at least once. Off to the third-degree room. He was then interrogated by the "experts" of the TSA, including being asked about "his affiliation with, or knowledge of, any terrorist organizations." He was also grilled on whether he had been asked to display the Fourth Amendment by any third party, and what his intentions and goals were.

Tobey was charged with violation of a misdemeanor statute with wording that sounds a bit like disturbing the peace, or daring to quote the Constitution, or expressing a favorable opinion of America, or something subversive like that. It took two weeks for the morons at the Henrico County prosecutor's office to drop the charge. He had followed the law to the letter, cooperating completely with the official gropers, but drew the ire of the pervs at TSA by displaying his peaceful and otherwise private objection to the search.

Any young man smart enough to use a magic marker to express his objection to a very intrusive search is smart enough to find his way to a lawyer's office after being purposely humiliated and arrested for no known cause other than exercising his First Amendment right to post on his body the Fourth Amendment. Both Amendments are contained in young Tobey's lawsuit for unlawful detention.

Now for my female readers, I wish to remind you that this article is about the text, not the surface it was written on. I will say, however, that I never looked like that on the best day of my life, but if I had, you'd play hell getting me to put my clothes on. There is one good thing in all of this. Despite the detention and third-degree by the American Gestapo, Tobey still made it in time for his grandma's funeral.