Because the last one worked so well, they're doing it again tonight! Live from Iowa, it's Children of the Corn 2: Pandering Boogaloo! Join us, tonight on Fox at 9:00 PM EST, casual dress, overalls preferred, B.Y.O.B. Farm subsidies for the first twenty people through the door!
Come one, come all....
... will Newt insult us all?
... will Romney say something memorable?
... will Ron Paul praise our new Iranian overlords?
... will Rick Perry shake the Teletubby?
... will anyone finally realize Santorum offers us utopia?
... will Bachmann don black-face to attract Cain's supporters?
... will Huntsman finally become a 2%er?
All this and more, tonight! Leave your thoughts below.
Thursday, December 15, 2011
T-Rav's Sockpuppet Theater Presents: Children of the Corn 2!
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534 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 201 – 400 of 534 Newer› Newest»that's the truth (austin american)
Perry is going off topic... danger, danger. Stupidity alert.
Oh, Perry. Don't accuse it of being a lie. Just explain it and tell us what you learned from it.
#dodge
Ok, I do like that.
yay Texas!
Um, I don't think that's entirely accurate. But it all goes back to Texas, doesn't it?
Of course, 140 every two years means the President becomes the only power in Washington.
"An adult conversation with Beijing"?
... hello, what at you wearing?
... something sexy, you?
... overalls.
cue sexy music with funk bass
Down with the rest of the world.... I LOVE CHINA!!!!
Whenever I look at Huntsman, I think of myself.
(in Texas, the LT Gov has the extra power)
I support a tax holiday, but only for heterosexual couples.
pander to Iowa
rlaWTX... that would be Biden.
AHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!
Rick, Rick, Rick...those manufacturing jobs are not coming back. I wish they were, but they're not. They're just not. Move on, dude.
Santorum: I know Iowa! Yipee!
I promise to repeal everything passed since 1952.
@leonjames: the federal & state govts
By the way, you know what would be a good way to make manufacturing and business in general competitive? Eliminate the minimum wage. How's that for a radical solution?
In the next 10 years the most jobs will be made in Jello-wrestling-rink manufacture.
That's the right answer. Color me shocked.
and you can't touch manufacturing without crushing Big Labor
Hurh? Someone wants to give me lots of power? Hot dog!! Where do I sign my Isaac Newton on that bill?
Again, I like Romney tonight. This has been a solid performance. Well spoken, sounds good, generally conservative.
Okay, I think the judiciary needs to be reined in, but that's probably going a little too far.
Impeaching judges is a non-starter.
It's also unconstitutional.... but that doesn't matter to Newt.
Hey, Newt never had an idea he didn't like!
they aren't supposed to read the American people - they should read the American Constitution
I taught a short course on the short bus.
I've been working on this project along with space mirrors in between rests on Pelosi's couch.
It should be noted, though, that the judicial branch was intended by the Founders to be the weakest branch of government, not the strongest.
FDR!!!!!!!!!!!!!
rlaWTX, BINGO! Newt doesn't know that.
Stupid founders, writing the Constitution in ink. Why couldn't they have used a pencil?
Hey Newt, I thought you learned it was a bad idea to cite me in your arguments?
didn't Lincoln try to stuff the SCOTUS too????
Newt does not believe in rule of law because he is advocating changing the judges when he doesn't like the law rather than changing the law.
good question!
Shelly, just say no.
And there's the flaw in Gingrich's plan, which otherwise has some merit.
the 9th Circuit is bonkers. I will grant that...
If the courts get it wrong, the Congress passes laws to change the decision -- you don't impeach judges.
yay Iowa
Pander Time!!!
Iowa is so perfect, I will move the White House here!
Enter Ron Paul who actually understand the constitution.
Yay, Shelly! She's actually starting to sound like she used to, instead of that weird technocrat that was showing up to all those other debates.
wiggly worms
Paul is right on this. Newt is a monster.
Actually, I do applaud Iowans for doing that. That was a bullcrap move by the judges.
oooooh! good Q
Good question.
Yes. Newt's Own(R) Can-O-Worms.
Ok, that's actually probably a legitimate explanation.
My greatest talent has always been hair-splitting.
I agree with you, Andrew, Romney is sounding good tonight...
Gotta side with T-Rav on the Iowa thing. There was a lot of griping on the local radio shows even on this side of the river.
Again, Romney is actually correct on this.
No, I'm not being paid to say that.
Favorite Justice... Thomas. 100%
what question?
Just say a name, Rick! Like Clarence Thomas! Stop talking!
which Rick?
I just want a name! Any name!
If I believed this were the real Romney, I'd have no qualms voting for him after tonight. (So far...)
All four are good, but I stick with Thomas.
Ron Paul: #dodge
rla, well I was originally referring to Santorum, but apparently all Ricks on stage are unable to respond.
"let's face it."
stop saying that Jon
Let's face it, Huntsman needs to go.
And I need to go get more cereal.
Did someone say "cereal"? You speaketh my language!
I should probably write about Newt's judge thing. He's wrong on this. He shows ZERO constitutional restraint. Moreover, he's jumping way beyond what he needs to do to solve the problem an that shows a serious problem in his thinking.
National popular vote sucks... don't be fooled.
Really? REALLY?! @#$% you, National Popular Vote!
Who said national popular vote? Was that Newt. I probably didn't hear it over my choking about his other answers.
yeah, what T-Rav said.
They make some freaky books/movies in Sweden, I've learned. Just gonna throw that out there.
tryanmax, It was a stupid ad.
I tried reading that book...
Now the swimsuit/overall competition.
is something off with Perry's neck?
Where'd my comment go? Strange.
Andrew, since he brought up FDR as someone who "got it right," let's not forget that he was the President who attempted to pack the Supreme Court with liberal judges so he could keep the New Deal. Just saying.
I welcome our new Iranian overlords.
rla, I got to one of the--um--sex scenes, and had to stop reading. Ugh.
did Paul actually reference the UN as proof????
rlaWTX -- you mean like a pod person neck?
T-Rav, I didn't get that far...
yes, Andrew!
Wait a minute... sex scene? What book?
Adventures by Britain and France against the sovereign Reich are a trampling of European liberties, especially when Hitler has made it very clear the Sudetenland is his last territorial goal.
Hitler was surrounded too.
Okay, sorry, something happened to my last couple of posts.
"Girl With The Dragon Tattoo." I guess you didn't see the commercial. It's, uh, graphic. I'm just going to leave it at that.
let me repeat... what book?
Bret keeps trying to help Paul make sense... it's not working...
Ah... I see. Thanks. I thought it was something in Perry's book.
Imagine... my... surprise...
Okay. Please, please, shut up. You're an idiot and should be allowed nowhere near the White House. Shut up.
graphic generally isn't a problem for me - but it wasn't making sense.
(like Paul)
So the bleep is not the Daily Double?
This Iran question has come up in every single debate. I'm frankly sick of it.
uhoh, Santorum is making sense... it makes my head hurt...
Oh, Lord. After hearing Ron Paul speak, Santorum suddenly sounds like a voice of clarity in my head. What's happening to me?
($10,000 wager on Iran, Alex)
"Don't hate me because I'm beautiful...."
Andrew, if we ask it enough time, maybe we'll get the right answer.
tryanmax, I don't think so. However, I could have sworn I saw Alex Trebek in the audience.
rlaWTX, LOL! :)
did he ask nicely - and bow?
Now I KNOW there's no sex scene in Romney's book.
Again, Romney = solid tonight.
I said "Pretty please." What more did you want me to do?
Obama should have said, "Pleeeeeease. I'll be your best frieeeeeend."
Where did my world go wrong?
Andrew, are you SURE about that? ;-)
Anybody read Cain's book? Just askin'.
you are wrong, T-Rav!
(oops, nevermind, my mind was in the gutter, not T-Rav's)
We weren't too crazy about his "leadership," either, ma'am.
With all due respect to Mr. Paul... you suck.
bleep
bleep
bleeeeeeeeeeeep
T-Rav, Yeah, I'm sure.
My mind is never in the gutter, and I resent the implication!
That is definitely something that deserves to be brought up more often.
wtf, Paul?
Where is the bouncer?
Hmmm. I hadn't expected you would cite the CIA as a valid source, Congressman.
don't let them cheer him!
Oh, Ron, go stick a daisy in the barrel of a gun.
Don't put me back in my straitjacket! Please!!
Take it outside kids.
UN??? how can Paul say that the UN is a good source??
So, it's all a huge conspiracy? They're making things up now? Please.
Wait, is there no UN report? Or is the UN report falsified? Which is it?
bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep
I hate you both.
We don't really rely on the UN now.
So as we snap back to reality...
Citing Bachmann as a source is even worse than citing the UN.
that snap hurt.
WHAT?
Huntsman: let's submit to China and then let them handle Iran.
Wow, I agree with Huntsman for once.
Out as best friend: Israel
In as best friend: China!
a thousand points of light!
He's been double-dinged!
rlaWTX, It looks like his neck grew. It's 5-6 inches longer than it used to be.
What's the difference between an "overfly zone" and a "no-fly-zone"? Discuss!
No fly zone over Syria = bad idea.
is his head too small?
Oh, no fly zone. I was scared for a minute. I though they were talking about a no pie zone. Whew.
rlaWTX, Maybe it shrank?
Which I just realized is what I should have been doing for the past twenty years.
Newt sometimes gets accused of language that is too egomaniacal.
Newt can toss out the one-liners... isn't that a Constitutional requirement for the presidency?
tryanmax, if anyone tries to declare a "no-pie-zone," there will be trouble.
Yeah, Newt you just sounded like you said something! Wooo hoo!
(re: Perry - I know who he reminds me of - that alien who got his head shot off in MIB)
Okay, in all honesty, Newt put a bullseye on that issue, even though it wasn't really answering the question.
How dare that kittycat picture compare me to Rick Perry!
Oh, here it is. Article II, Section 5.
The President shall be quick with clever one-liners provided they not be too zany.
rlaWTX, LOL!
Huntsman hate heroine addiction!
Okay, that latest sockpuppet should have read "Tony Shalhoub," not "t." Typing FAIL.
tryanmax, I knew that was in there somewhere,next to the "ice cream for all" clause.
thanks, tryanmax - I knew it was in there!
Tony - only when your head was growing back!
I thought the ice cream was in the Bill of Rights.
This question makes no sense to me. If everything goes wrong, how long would you stop the world to figure out what had happened?
Huh?
This is what the candidates should be doing all along--emphasizing why Barack Obama sucks.
Keystone Beer was ok.
good point, Shelly, pounce on TOTUS instead of GOPs!
Whoa! I think the debate just started.
It's in the "Dessert Clause" of the Constitution.
Yeah, but Keystone XL comes in a bigger can.
rlaWTX, His head kind of bobbles around on his neck too, like it's loose. Maybe he's a robot or something?
But I don't like you.
Wait a minute... so the Feds shouldn't pick winners and losers, but Iowan's should?
Which worked out well for us.
if bobble-head dolls had little heads instead of big ones, he'd qualify...
Andrew, Iowans are SPECIAL!! When will you learn?!
Pander me banana. Pander my banana. Pander my banana. Pander my banana. Pander my banana. Pander my banana. Pander my banana. Pander my banana. Pander my banana. Pander my banana. Pander my banana. Pander my banana. Pander my banana. Pander my banana. Pander my banana.
wind energy ~ hot air -- the same thing? if so, then yeah, we got lots in TX.
Enough with the windmills. You know where they've got lots of windmills? South Dakota. But they're not doing anything because there is nowhere to send the power.
Windmills only work when they are close to something. Until all the Californians and NorthEasterners stop crying "NIMBY" windmills will be worthless.
A bobble head! LOL!
OK, I'll give him +1 for saying state tax policy is different that fed tax policy.
Commercial poll: Miller or Keystone Lite?
I'm for slave powered generators in California.
Miller.
Let's just say that Iowans are so special, they had to be separated from their neighbors by rivers on both sides.
IOWA, um...I'm afraid to ask what that means.
we have miles of windmills - looks like an alien invasion marching across the plains - but they are out in the middle of windy WTX, not electricity using NYC or NTX or hot air capital Austin.
I'm a Coors drinker, myself.
All alcohol is of the devil.
IOWA = Idiots Out Wandering Around
Dear Iowa, beer is made from corn in the US.
is this a serious question??????
Eric Holder can bite my ass.
"Clear proof," as in, "We didn't see the gun actually smoking as he held it in his hand."
Look, don't live in Texas, it ain't safe!
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