Obamacare Means Freedom!

You can take the boy out of San Francisco, but you can’t take San Francisco out of the boy. I look forward all week to the weekly e-mail from my former House Representative, Nancy Pelosi. But as good as those e-mails are, they are carefully vetted and edited for maximum appeal to the left. One thing is better—NANCY LIVE! Whenever I need my dose of crazy, I pray that Nancy will show up.

She never disappoints. On Thursday last, San Fran Nan actually outdid her Obamacare speech in which she said that Congress should pass the bill so they could read it. Now that the act has been on the books for two years, good ol’ Nancy topped it with her pithy analysis of just what Obamacare actually means. I know I’m being lazy, but I’m going to let Nancy’s own words comprise the largest part of this post.

You see, Obamacare isn’t about health care at all. It’s about freedom. Freedom to do just about any damn’ thing. Nancy herself finally read the whole megillah and discovered that it truly is the wonder of the 21st century. Death panels aside, Obamacare has taken up the torch of the Founding Fathers because it allows everyone the freedom to quit his or her job and become a photographer, a writer, a musician, or (verbatim) “whatever.”

Ignore the incoherence, just go with the emotion. “This is what our founders had in mind—ever expanding opportunity for people. You want to be self-employed, if you want to start a business, you want to change jobs, you no longer are prohibited from doing that because you can’t have access to health care, especially because you do not want to put your family at risk.”

Who knew? The Occupy bums would all be titans of industry or playwrights to rival Shakespeare if only they had had Obamacare when they were younger. But their children will be able to fulfill those dreams, all because of the brilliance of a health care act that nobody but Pelosi actually understands. Best of all, Obamacare almost guarantees perfect self-fulfillment for coming generations, since parents can pay for their children’s health insurance until those “children” reach age 26. Nancy should hop on a horse, grab a spear, don a kilt, paint her face blue, and trot around shouting “Freedom!”

Having discovered that brevity is the soul of wit, Nancy goes halfway there by declaring: “How many people in America do you think have a preexisting medical condition? That is, they may have been sick when they were little, or they had cancer and now are cancer free, and isn’t that a celebration? But you always carry that preexisting condition and the discrimination with you—until now. And we cannot let that be rolled back because it affects tens of millions of Americans directly and their families as well, so our whole country.” Whew! I had to listen to that several times before I entirely understood it. Well, maybe I haven’t entirely understood it yet. If I had cancer, but now I’m cancer free, I can write a symphony? Is that it?

Nancy closes by proving that she understands free enterprise from the basics up. Yessir. “We see it as an entrepreneurial bill. A bill that says to someone, if you want to be creative and be a musician or whatever, you can leave your work, focus on your talent, your skill, your passion, your aspiration, because you will have health care. You won’t have been locked.” I wish English were my native tongue so that I could bask in the brilliance of each nuance in Nancy’s speeches. Uh, wait. English is my native tongue. Help!

Why does this all remind me of a very old joke? Patient: “Doctor, after I have the operation will I be able to play the piano?” Doctor: “Absolutely.” Patient: “That’s odd, I never could before.”