Thursday, October 13, 2011

Latino Theme Parks

Barack Obama's Secretary of the Interior Ken Salazar has now been recruited to bring back the Hispanic votes for the post-racial President. They've largely failed on the Dream Act, and the economy is so bad that even the illegals are starting to leave. So what to do? Start creating more Latino-themed national parks and historic landmarks.

No, I'm not talking about more Taco Bells. They're about as Hispanic as Arby's Roast Beef. El Pollo Loco is closer, if only because I'd love to have a national landmark called "The Crazy Chicken." Salazar is talking about real parks and real landmarks. And while he's at it, he thinks parks and landmarks should also increase the representation of women, African-Americans and other "minority" groups. Obama has basically lost the middle class of all colors and ethnicities, so it's time to make a big splash to draw back the victim groups.

Obama first appealed to the Hispanic demographic during his famous Cinco de Cuatro speech. Things have been going downhill ever since. Now, he realizes that he has a built-in Latino to do his demagoguing for him. Pan y Circos (bread and circuses) are out, parks and landmarks are in. Obama and Salazar deny that this is about vote-getting. Salazar says "the White House meetings following Hispanic Heritage Month have nothing to do with electoral politics--and are instead designed to improve the country's poor preservation of Hispanic history and culture." And if you believe that, I still have that orange bridge in San Francisco I'm willing to sell you cheap.

I don't want to be difficult, but in California alone there are four major landmarks not named after famous Swedes--San Francisco, Los Angeles, Sacramento, and San Diego. Salazar doesn't care. His view is that "less than three percent of all the national landmarks we have are dedicated to 'minorities.'" So now, conveniently, is the time to start catching up because "that tells you that the score is not even." It's purely coincidental that the time to do it coincides with the nadir of Obama's popularity among minorities and the opening shots of the 2012 electoral wars.

It's also coincidental that on Wednesday, the White House held a major conference at the executive mansion to discuss Latino heritage. The mission statement of the conference: "To focus on whether the government is properly serving Hispanic students, small business owners, military veterans, and artists." The four California cities I mentioned aren't enough, so Salazar met earlier with California National Park Rangers to try to identify Latino-themed sites in the state. I hope they met at historic and tourist-popular Olvera Street in Los Angeles.

Salazar has said that there's a huge history of Latinos in the United States that's never been told. How that is going to be advanced by creating or altering national parks and landmarks he didn't say. One spot he would like to choose is the "Forty Acres" used by Cesar Chavez during his attacks on farms, farmers, and unwilling migrant farm workers. Here's a snap quiz: Name any California city with a population over 500,000 that doesn't have a street, avenue or boulevard named after Cesar Chavez.

Not to be outdone by the Martin Luther King, Jr. memorial in Washington DC, Salazar has recently involved himself in the proposed National Museum of the American Latino. Salazar and multiple Latino special pleaders, with the enthusiastic support of the DC city planning commission are looking to locate the museum near the Capitol, at an estimated cost of $600 million. Now, Salazar has ordered a national study (cost unknown) of people and places worthy of national historic preservation.

I have a suggestion. The Alamo was designated a national historical landmark in 1960. Whites, Texans, expansionists, jingoistic norteamericanos, and xenophobes co-opted the site. So in 2011-2012, the Alamo should be re-designated a Latino Historical Landmark. After all, the Mexicans won that battle, didn't they?

32 comments:

Tehachapi Tom said...

Hawk
What is there to say? All of the Southwest is liberally seasoned with Latino names on every thing from El Camino to Banos. You can find many of the latter reside along side the former.
The city of your former residence to the current community you reside in are not Anglo Saxon,Asian or African in their origin.
Try some of the States names Colorado, Nevada, California and New Mexico come to mind.
Shouldn't the focus be on the state of the union?

BevfromNYC said...

Good Point. Yes, Mexico DID win at the Alamo. But the Alamo has been a Texas state monument for a lot longer. My mother made my father swear his allegiance to Texas in front of the Alamo before she would marry him. (He was a dang Yankee)

But all over Texas and the Southwest there are monuments to the Spanish settlers - many, many missions. Of course the Spanish Conquistadors were also instrumental in the destruction and deaths of the many of the indigenous cultures in the New World (i.e. The Indians), but no one blames the Spanish, do they? They blame the English because they are the only "white men" that count.

LawHawkRFD said...

Tehachapi Tom: Actually, the name of my former residence (San Francisco) is a relatively recent creation by historical standards. It was originally called Yerba Buena (good herb). Somehow, that seems more appropriate than naming it after a saint. Los Angeles would be even more of a dilemma, if you wanted to be technical. Its original name is El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora la Reina de Los Angeles de Porciuncula. Rather than come up with Los Angeles, they name we adopted could have been La Reina, or worse--Porky's.

T-Rav said...

So I gather once 13 percent or whatever it is of the parks and national monuments are Latino-oriented, we'll no longer have a problem with Hispanics being underrepresented? Everything will be just hunky-dory then, right?

Also, in the interests of equal representation and so on, I might respectfully suggest that this new Center for the American Latino or whatever the heck it is include depictions of a few drug mules. Or some of those cartel members. Because they have voices too, after all.

LawHawkRFD said...

Bev: In a lot of the revisionist/irredentist literature being bandied about by MEChA and other radical "Latino" groups, the Spanish don't fare a lot better than the English or other northern Europeans. It's all about being Native American or MesoAmerican rather than admitting any European ancestry at all.

LawHawkRFD said...

T-Rav: How about killing two birds with one stone? A monument to celebrate inter-racial/inter-ethnic cooperation. We could call it the Eric Holder/Sinaloa Cartel Weapons Cache National Park. No entry fee so long as you're coming from the south.

rlaWTX said...

they'd better keep their grimy hands off the Alamo! Shame on you, Hawk, for suggesting that!!!

as for the the rest of it, how about we figure the percentage of state names that are "Latino" or "Native American" and count that as our acknowledgement of their contributions. I don't have any problem including actual historical contributions, but let's not inflate or invent them...

BevfromNYC said...

But LawHawk - How do they suppose that they speak Spanish and Portuguese if it were not for the conquering Iberians?

LawHawkRFD said...

rlaWTX: In all fairness to me, I have a raw spot in my mouth from putting my tongue in my cheek when making that suggestion. LOL

My only problems would be either re-naming already-established parks and monuments, or grabbing more land from the states and private hands to create a feelgood paean to "minorities." And you are right pointing out the already large number of states, cities and historical places with Latino/Hispanic and Native American names.

LawHawkRFD said...

Bev: Actually, the Mayans and Aztecs invented the Romance languages and even carved them into their 2012 doomsday prophecies. The Iberians stole the two languages from them. Don't you watch the History Channel? LOL

AndrewPrice said...

Pandering to ethnic groups is what the Democrats do.

T-Rav said...

Aargh, Blogger ate my Aztec sockpuppet. Maybe I can use that as proof that Blogger is racist and thus blackmail it into doing my bidding.

Anyway, if you really think about it, the Mayans and Aztecs invented everything worthwhile, didn't they? They were so much more advanced than we could ever hope to be, they were maybe in communication with the divine (or aliens), and there was peace and harmony everywhere. It was a grand utopia, I tell ya! Except for that whole human sacrifice thing...

LawHawkRFD said...

Andrew: True enough, and it should be patently obvious to anyone who cares to look that their concern for special victims groups always takes center stage during election season.

Patti said...

oh. my. goodness. let them have the alamo?! ~texas faint~

bev is right, there are so many other monuments that they already have. if you give them the alamo, prepare yourself for a battle (this one i *think* we can win)...

LawHawkRFD said...

T-Rav: It wasn't Blogger--it was us (but don't tell anyone). LOL

The Aztecs and Mayas didn't invent everything. The Arabs did. Refresh your memory at Forget What You Thought You Knew.

LawHawkRFD said...

Patti: I didn't say give them the Alamo, I just said re-name the monument. LOL

As for winning the battle, it would all depend on whether the federal troops and the now well-armed Mexican cartels can hold off the angry Texans.

tryanmax said...

I just hope guilt is enough. If anyone shows up at my door for reparations, I can maybe offer some Hot Pockets and a Coke, but not much more.

BevfromNYC said...

But "Alamo" is already an Hispanic name...it means "dogwood". I'm confused why you want to give the Alamo back to Mexico?? That's just not right!

[she says as she whispers this down the lane that is Obama who she is questioning and to spread insurrection and a possible secession]

LawHawkRFD said...

Bev: I ain't givin' back the Alamo! I just want to give Salazar and Obama a meaningless and temporary victory by adding "Hispanic" to the monument's designation. It won't gain them a single vote (which is what they're angling for) and it will bring a lot of American fence-sitters back into our pasture. They can have Santa Anna, and we get Crockett, Travis, Bowie and the other heroes. After the expulsion of Obama in 2012, we can change the designation back at the Republican inauguration in January 2013. Remember the Cape Canaveral, Cape Kennedy, Cape Canaveral switcheroo?

BevfromNYC said...

Just checking 'cause is just seemed like you wanted to let Obama take the Alamo and give it back. And that thar' is fightin' words!

LawHawkRFD said...

Bev: You should know me better than that by now. And we're not giving 'em back California, Arizona, Nevada, New Mexico or any other part of the imaginary MEChA land of Aztlán either.

As I said to rlaWTX above, the whole Alamo thing was said tongue in cheek.

Tennessee Jed said...

when I visited the Alamo, the speaker (ranger) politely reminded us that it was a church and a shrine and so we shouldn't spit. I'd be all in for an East L.A. monument honoring the Mexican drug cartels. It could be made of hazardous waste, specifically used hypodermic needles and crack pipes. Possibly, a tatoo parlour as a Latino memorial.

Seriously, isn't major league baseball tribute enough?

rlaWTX said...

you gotta be careful about upsettin' the Texans 'round here... we get testy...

LawHawkRFD said...

rlaWTX: I apologize. I forgot to take special sensitivities in Texas into account. We Californians are so laid-back, you know. LOL

LawHawkRFD said...

Tennessee: I'm taking the Alamo off the table and going with your suggestion. An East L.A. monument with a giant statue of Cheech Marin holding a joint in one hand and a Fast and Furious assault rifle in the other.

Libertarian Advocate said...

We could call it the Eric Holder/Sinaloa Cartel Weapons Cache National Park

LawHawk: Very funny! I got a kick out of Holder's expression the other day when he was asked about the [then] impending subpoenas about to be served on him by the House. Looked like his lunch was coming back up on him. The guy looked scared sh*tless....

BevNYC: You made me crack up with that bit about your mother compelling your father's oath of allegiance to Texas at the Alamo

LawHawkRFD said...

Libertarian Advocate: On occasion, Holder's deadpan face slips. When he is trapped, particularly in his own webs of deceit, he does get a deer-in-the-headlights, I'm gonna be sick look.

StanH said...

Speaking of Taco Bell, I stopped at a Taco Bell the other day to use the bathroom, definitely not to eat. While coming out I was wandering, “do Mexicans actually eat at Taco Bell?” …when at that very moment a van full of Mexicans doing jobs Americans won’t do pulled up answering my question on the spot. What does that have do with your brilliant expose…nothing.

I look for hysterics from the democrats as the election of 2012 approaches. Nothing is out of the realm of possibility.

LawHawkRFD said...

Stan: Well, I've seen Germans going into Wienerschnitzel, so I guess everybody does it. LOL

I admit I'm a bit nervous about the 2012 election. The pandering to "victim" groups is the worst I've ever seen, and now Obama is turning into "Wag The Dog" Clinton. Well, at least this time it's corruption scandals they're trying to divert attention from rather than sexcapades.

Koshcat said...

As I understand it, Chavez hated illegal immigrant farm workers and would call INS on them so sure I'm ok with a momento to him only if they tell the truth.

LawHawkRFD said...

Koshcat: Chavez was a sleazebag. He did his "hard-working" farm hand routine, but he was nothing more than a union/communist thug. He had small cadres of goons who beat up (and may have murdered) farm workers who didn't want to join the union. In over 75% of properly-supervised union local decertification votes, the UFW was tossed out on its ear. I wouldn't walk across a field to spit on his grave.

tryanmax said...

What is ironic is that our modern communists are generally aligned with the open-border crowd. When have you ever seen a communist regime with open borders?

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